We Did Not Fall Into Love- Thoughts on an Article in the New York Times . . .

We Did Not Fall Into Love ~  

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html?_r=0

{Part 1: This is my critique, as well as my opinion, on the article shown above- can a person really fall in love with another? }

'We did not fall into love. We made the choice to love each other.' Merely stating the outcome at the end of the piece choose her words must better than she could- it made her point. This was beautifully written.

The idea of 'falling into love' seems incredibly rash, and purely stupid. I have never pretended to understand how one could make such a decision. I have always wondered what would compel people to such a foolish act. You are probably correct in saying that some people can and will fall into love- perhaps, they are attracted to the idea of it? I never have been.

I remember the way that my mother elaborated on the topic: 'it was love at first sight,' was the platitude that she used to describe it. Thus, an internal compartment- some hidden hope, or chamber, locked away in my heart, or subconscious (call it what you will)- was born. On occasion, the dove that lived inside of it would always appear, fancying that it saw the 'look,' and would wonder about the phrase. Would I come across it sporadically, one day, as though in a fairytale?

'Love at first sight?' It is an attractive idea, but one that I scorn wholeheartedly. I do, absolutely believe that some people can fall into love. To me, love is a vague term that encompasses many traits, decisions, and qualities that comprise- shall we say, one grand feeling. It is the perception of love. Everyone has a unique way of finding it. For some, a long, upstanding friendship- lust for others- or perhaps need. There are hundreds of different scenarios . . .

The idea of 'falling into love,' just does not seem like a great idea. I truly wonder how people even try it. Finding yourself in that situation is like spiraling through a black chute- some hole which has no determinate point or axis. Is the person who has no relationships weaker that he/she, who has twenty? Is her vain of moral fiber not as strong?

What is worse? To experience this idea over ten or twelve different relationships, or not to have any? Is the person brave who keeps to the side, because they see the problem beforehand; see the 'hole?'

I am not asking you to answer. I just have always wondered. It is an idea that has often perplexed me. I do not believe that people should fall in love because they give up their right of choice; how can the individual, who is fully thinking, and in control, take that leap? It seems absurd . . .

The point, of course, is that you don't take a leap. You make the 'decision,' whether to love or not. We are not held onto by puppet-strings . . . in spite of what others may tell you.